New Mom Territory, Instruction Needed

Laughter and revelry fill my warm, cozy home for a few days when we have college guests. Not so much more than when other guests are here. Just sweeter somehow.

She was home again. My daughter. My “I’m a freshman in college” daughter. Who is more woman than girl now. Who is more reflective and forward looking now.

This is new territory for me. Territory I knew was coming, yet as with any challenging journey no matter how well prepared one thinks one is…there are surprises along the way.

“Mom…I am so happy. I love my friends and miss them so, so much when we are apart.”  Smiling at that proclamation I silently wonder, has she said that to her friends about me? Probably not as often as I’d suppose.

But that’s ok. That means I have done my job of mothering and preparing well.

I am propelled back to the three-year-old daughter, being dropped off in a new church classroom, the easy way she hugged me goodbye and bravely walked into a new room, not knowing a soul. She moved forward into that new territory bravely, I wondered why she forged on without even a glance backward.

Then, and now, I know it is because she is content wherever she is because she knows she is not alone. She has been taught that. By her father and me.

I hear her in her room when she chats with her Heavenly Father; I have seen journal entries she has chosen to share. I have seen serenity, peace and tranquility revealed when she puts pencil to sketch pad.

Still…there is that part of me that wants to hold on to the girl I was given and keep her all to myself.

Heavy sigh.

Oh what must my Heavenly Father have in store for this amazing daughter of mine? I pray He gives me the ability to face her future with as much grace and strength as she possesses.

A contented smile grows in gratefulness for the gift of motherhood and the well worn leather map that I use to chart the course each day – His word. Without it I’d be lost and lonely.